We often think of love as something we aspire toward: in a person, a feeling, or even a spark. Maybe you’ve heard of raising your vibration so that you can connect with something inside of you?

What if love isn’t something we chase, but something we can truly discover within?

In this week’s episode of Her New Lens, I sat down with intuitive teacher and author June Edward to explore a spiritual perspective on relationships. It views them not as random encounters, but as purposeful experiences shaped by energy, growth, and the evolution of our souls.

Whether you interpret that spiritually or psychologically, the core message is powerful:

Relationships are not accidents. They are here to teach, guide, and set us on our paths.

And when we understand the teaching they’re here for, we can stop repeating patterns that lead us astray.

Relationships Aren’t Random

One of the central ideas we explored is that every relationship carries a lesson.

Not just romantic partnerships, but friendships, family dynamics, coworkers, and even brief encounters. Each connection leaves an imprint and shapes us into who we are today.

When we look back at our lives, we can almost trace a line:

If I hadn’t met that person…

Maybe I wouldn’t have made that move.
Or wouldn’t have taken that risk.
I probably wouldn’t be who I am right now.

That perspective alone shifts us out of victimhood and into awareness.

Instead of asking, “Why did this happen to me?”
We begin asking, “What did this shape within me?”

**That is a higher lens.

Fear-Based vs. Love-Based Decisions

One of the most meaningful moments in our conversation was around fear.

June said something simple but profound:

The opposite of love is not hate — it’s fear.

When we live in fear, we cannot be fully connected to love or to our deeper knowing.

In dating, fear-based decisions look familiar:

• Over-texting

• Over-explaining

• Chasing

• Settling

• Ignoring red flags

• Clinging to potential

I know this list may seem jarring, but who hasn’t been there at some point? It’s fascinating to see how much fear can creep into our minds and hearts.

One way to test: Fear feels urgent, and love feels calm. You can ask yourself, where are you on this scale at any given moment?

What about love? When we’re connected to that state, we feel content, relaxed, and at ease. There can be a feeling of expansiveness. We don’t feel the urgency for drama or clinging.

When we date from heartbreak or unresolved loss, it just means our nervous system hasn’t healed or stabilized yet. And until it does, we are likely to attract someone who mirrors that same instability. (Think of the truth in this!)

But the key is that this is not punishment. It’s alignment.

Raising Your Vibration: You Can’t Chase What You’re Meant to Attract

There was a powerful metaphor shared in the episode: we are magnets.

Think of a physical magnet and how it works.

When we chase, we repel.

When we align, we attract.

We often believe that effort equals control and that if we try harder, analyze more, text differently, and show up perfectly, we can make love happen.

But relationships built on anxiety rarely feel secure.

The good news is that when you stabilize internally, your choices stabilize too.
When you regulate emotionally, your attraction patterns shift.
When you begin to love yourself, you stop asking others to validate your worth.

Karmic Relationships vs. Soulmate Connections

Another theme we explored was the difference between karmic and soulmate relationships.

In spiritual language, karmic relationships often feel intense, unstable, wound-activating. They carry lessons that require growth, boundaries, and awareness.

They may feel like:

• Waiting for the other shoe to drop

• Living in hypervigilance

• Walking on emotional eggshells

• Feeling slightly “off” even in good moments

Soulmate relationships, on the other hand, expand capacity. They may still teach us — but they feel grounded, safe, and growth-oriented rather than chaotic.

Whether you interpret this through energy or attachment theory, the pattern is the same: Some relationships activate wounds.
While others expand calmness and well-being.

The skill is learning to tell the difference. The faster, the better!

** Read more about soulmates here:

Important: Love Is Not a Feeling You Chase

I think the part of our conversation I enjoyed the most was about this. Love is not something you find; it’s something you access inside of yourself.

We often treat love as an external validation system, and use it as proof that we are lovable, chosen, worthy.

But if love is a state of being rather than a transaction, then it does not disappear when someone leaves. Instead, it remains within us all the time.

When you cultivate love internally, through self-respect, boundaries, and emotional steadiness, you stop looking for someone else to prove your value.

Then you can begin attracting resonance instead of validation or reassurance.

Raising Your Vibration and Mastery in Relationships

So what does relationship mastery actually mean?

According to June, it means:

• Understanding your reactions

• Owning your triggers

• Not personalizing everything

• Choosing alignment over ego

• Recognizing where your power truly lies

In developing mastery, you learn that no one can make you feel happy, insecure, or whole. Only you have that power. (If only it were this easy to understand and practice in daily life!)

And when two emotionally regulated people meet, happiness expands.

June’s Recommended Lens: A Lens of Happiness

At the end of the conversation, I asked June what lens she would suggest listeners try on.

Her answer: a lens of happiness.

Not a temporary high, but intentional joy.

Because happiness, laughter, and presence shift energy. They change the rooms we walk into,  alter the kinds of conversations we have, and recalibrate our internal state.

And from that state, everything else flows differently.

Final Reflection on Love and Raising Your Vibration

Whether you interpret this episode through spirituality, psychology, or a blend of both, here’s what I’m taking away from this conversation:

You experience love through the lens you hold.

And when you shift that lens from fear to awareness, from chasing to alignment, from validation to embodiment, your relationships begin to reflect that change.

Love isn’t something we wait for. It’s something we embody.

If this resonated, I invite you to listen to the full episode. And if you’re ready to explore your own patterns in a grounded, heart-led way, you can learn more about working with me at triciarosestone.com.

Because sometimes the most powerful shift isn’t finding the right person. It’s raising your vibration naturally so that you can finally connect to and feel the love you have inside.

It’s seeing yourself and love differently.

** See full podcast/ shownotes here.