Harnessing the Power of Reflection for Personal Growth and Clarity

December is here—a time of endless to-do lists, holiday chaos, and year-end deadlines. You might be asking yourself, “Why should I stop, even for 30 minutes, to reflect when so much is happening?”

Here’s why.

December is more than just the end of the year—it’s a natural point of transition, marking the close of one chapter and the start of another. That’s why it’s the perfect time to pause and reflect on the year that’s passed.

I came across a fresh perspective in Harvard Business Review that gives meaning to the power of reflection. It says, “Reflection is about learning—looking back on the day, month, or year without bias, judgment, or regret, and carefully exploring your behavior and its consequences. It’s about sitting with yourself, thinking honestly about what happened, understanding what worked, acknowledging what didn’t, and determining what can or cannot be done moving forward. Reflection requires courage. It’s deliberate, thoughtful, and vital for staying at the top of your game because it helps you draw lessons from your past to shape your future.”

Pretty awesome, right?

It’s not always easy. It requires honesty and courage to sit in silence and evaluate your experiences. But the rewards are undeniable—a deeper understanding of yourself and a clearer path forward.

**Later, I’ll share a personal story about my own reflection process and the surprising impact it’s had. But first, let’s explore why this time of year is uniquely ideal for the practice of reflection.

Aligning with the Rhythm of Nature for Self-Reflection and Growth

Without our even knowing it, nature gently guides us toward a season of slowing down and going inward. This natural pull mirrors the rhythm of life itself. In my Wayfinder Coaching program this year, we studied the four ‘squares’ of a butterfly’s journey: the egg, larva (caterpillar), pupa (chrysalis), and adult (butterfly).

Similarly, we traverse through four distinct seasons, each offering different challenges, meanings, and opportunities.

December invites you inward—a time to release what no longer serves you and prepare for the new year. Personally, I’ve found myself giving into this rhythm by spending more quiet evenings at home, sharing earlier dinners, watching movies, lighting candles, and having more quiet time in general.

You can also think of your own life and its various phases as seasons. Are you in a “spring” moment—planning, preparing, clearing paths for what’s ahead? Or are you immersed in “summer,” where you’re deeply engaged in projects, savoring the vibrancy and momentum? Perhaps it’s “autumn,” where you reap the rewards of your efforts and start to wind down with gratitude for what you’ve built. Still, we will always have “winter,” a time of slowing down, drawing inward, and preparing for the renewal ahead.

**December solstice is a particularly important date every year. Read ideas on how to move through winter solstice here.

Best Techniques for Reflection: Open-ended Questions.

Reflection helps us better understand where we are in life, where we’ve been, and where we can go. Journaling with open-ended questions is one of the most effective ways to truly reflect. Your questions can spark insights, unlock realizations, and shift your perspective.

Journaling with Purpose

When journaling, work with questions that stand out to you most. They should make you pause, think, and dig a little deeper. I’ve included links to a few resources in the show notes with great examples of questions to start with. Here’s a simple framework to begin:

1. Scan through the questions provided and pick three that jump out immediately.
2. Prepare your space—you only need a notebook and a pen. Studies show there’s a strong connection when physically writing things down. It activates different parts of your brain, allowing you to uncover deeper thoughts and feelings.
3. Be honest and allow your thoughts to flow freely. Don’t overthink the answers—write whatever comes to mind. You may be surprised to discover layers of emotions and ideas you hadn’t considered before.

Some impactful questions to reflect on include:

• Am I doing what truly makes me happy?
• What could I have done differently this week/month/year?
• Am I taking anything or anyone for granted right now?
• What were my greatest wins this year?
• What obstacles did I overcome, and how did I grow through them?
• Where did I sabotage myself, and how can I break that pattern for the future?

This process is about understanding where you are and using that knowledge to move forward intentionally and mindfully.

The Power of Reflection and Connecting with Your Higher Self

Reflection helps us connect with the part of ourselves that holds deeper truths—the observer, the inner witness.

Have you heard of Internal Family Systems? This concept, introduced by Richard Schwartz, suggests that we all possess different parts within us—distinct facets of our personality. The more we become familiar with these internal parts, the greater our understanding of our reactions, behaviors, and emotions. This awareness allows us to live a richer, more fulfilling life.

When you take time to reflect, you activate your higher Self—the wise, sovereign self that holds the answers you already know deep down. It’s like looking at life through a clearer, more compassionate lens. Shining a light shows you where some of your “parts” might sabotage progress in certain areas of your life, so you can gently make changes to move forward in new ways.

Reflection places you in the role of a neutral observer. You can remove your immediate emotions and ask yourself, “Where am I in this? How can I do better?” This clarity enables growth and provides the foundation for planning positive changes—for the new year or any chapter of life.

We all have this inner wisdom, but we may avoid it because it shows us truths we aren’t ready to face. Change is hard! We might need to break a habit that doesn’t serve us or need to start our day with more purpose. Unless we’re honest with ourselves and take ownership of our actions, meaningful change won’t happen.

.

My Transformative New Year’s Experience at Kripalu:

In 2015, I found myself in Boston with no exciting New Year’s plans on the calendar. Rather than sulking (!), I decided to head to Kripalu, my favorite yoga retreat center in Western Massachusetts. I signed up for a four-day program called something like “Kundalini Yoga and Art: A Journey to Wellbeing.”

When I arrived, the center was bustling with energy. People from around the world were gathered, creating a vibrant and inviting atmosphere. That first night, I attended the welcome session, and that’s when I met the instructor—someone who left an unforgettable impression on me.

She was probably in her early 70s, dressed in a radiant white wrap, and exuded an almost otherworldly energy. Her aura was beautiful, and the sheer radiance of her presence was unlike anything I had encountered before. Although through her bio, I knew she was older, it was as if she had transcended time—she radiated vitality in a way that felt inspiring.

Through the program, our days were structured around a thoughtfully designed curriculum. She outlined it calmly and commandingly, saying, “We’ll do Kriya yoga at five in the morning daily. Then, we’ll move on to art classes during the day. Later, we’ll gather for more Kundalini yoga in the afternoon and evening.”

My first thought was, “Five in the morning? UGH! I am not a morning person.” Still, I promised myself I would do it. At 5 AM the next morning, I joined the group for an hour of Kriya yoga under her guidance. Surprisingly, I found myself enjoying the class. I felt energy moving and shifting inside of me. It was as though something important within me had been unlocked, and for the first time in years, I felt peaceful and aligned.

More of the Kundalini/Art weekend:

The program continued with art sessions in a spacious room that brimmed with creative energy. The instructor handed us an enormous seven-foot sheet of paper and said, “I want you to take the colors, mix them up, and paint from your heart.” Her words encouraged us to immerse ourselves in this process—brushes in motion, colors blending, energy shifting.

Later, she introduced the final part of the program—reflection. Each of us was handed a journal and instructed to answer self-reflective prompts. This third element of the retreat tied everything together. After yoga and painting, we were encouraged to sit with our thoughts, ask ourselves deep questions, and put our reflections into words.

This was the first time I’d ever done this in earnest. And as I wrote, I began uncovering truths about myself. The journaling prompts pushed me to look at areas where I’d chosen the wrong path. It also awoke in me a new vision of what I wanted moving forward. I wrote and wrote and felt connected to my true self.

Looking back, that weekend at Kripalu wasn’t just a retreat but a turning point. The reflection I did formed the basis for what was to come in the following years.

This experience marked the beginning of an exciting new chapter in my life.

The following year marked major changes in my life. Opportunities started flowing in rapidly over the next one to two years. It felt like I was finally finding my groove after a long time of feeling stuck. I truly believe this happened because I took the time to reflect deeply and mindfully, probably for the first time in my entire life!

On some level, I embraced the messages I had given to myself. I decided to open up to the changes I knew I needed to make, which paid off. Reflection is always a worthwhile practice, whether done daily, monthly, or at the end of the year. Some people use daily gratitude reflections or five-minute journaling techniques to review what went well and what could be improved on any given day.

I’ll be doing this alongside you. On December 21, the solstice, I’ll dedicate 30 minutes to reflection. Over the following 10 days, I’ll deepen the process, exploring my insights and creating a clear plan for the year ahead. I’d love for you to join me in this practice.

A few more thoughts on the power of reflection:

* The Benefits of Practicing Self-Reflection for Emotional Intelligence:

• Regular self-reflection can increase self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and a more fulfilling life.
• Self-reflection helps us better understand ourselves and their habits (most of our day, we are on autopilot), allowing us to make meaningful, positive life changes.
• By reflecting on their experiences, we can learn from our mistakes and failures and, instead of burying them under the rug, use them as stepping stones for growth.
• Reflection empowers us to become very clear about our core values, enhance our decision-making skills, and make intentional decisions that align with our true selves.

Goal for 2025: Creating a Self-Reflection Habit.

Consider adding these ideas into your toolkit for 2025:

1. Set Aside Time Daily: Dedicate a few minutes each day to self-reflection. Whether it’s in the morning to set your intentions or in the evening to review your day, just do it!
2. Find a Quiet Space: Choose a quiet and comfortable space where you can reflect without distractions. This could be a cozy corner in your home, a peaceful park, or even a quiet coffee shop.
3. Use a Journal: Writing down your thoughts and insights can be incredibly beneficial. A journal allows you to process your experiences and track your growth over time.
4. Practice Mindfulness: Incorporate mindfulness into your self-reflection practice. Being present and non-judgmental can help you stay focused and gain deeper insights during your reflection time.
5. Make It a Routine: If you really want a gold star in self-care, integrate self-reflection into your daily routine. Reflecting at the same time each day can help make it a habit, ensuring that you consistently take time to understand yourself better.

I’ll be doing this alongside you. On December 21, the solstice, I’ll dedicate 30 minutes to reflection. Over the following 10 days, I’ll continue the process, exploring my insights and creating a clear plan for the year ahead. I’d love for you to join me in this practice.

Thank you for being here on this journey. Take some time for yourself and see where your reflections lead you. I’ll be back soon with more insights to share. Until then, take care, and happy reflecting!